How to Talk to Your Grown Daughter

How to Talk to Your Grown Daughter

One of the most challenging things about parenting is how to talk to your grown daughter.

They are no longer the little girl they once were, and the issues you need to discuss are tougher, no doubt.

Communication is now more accessible, affordable, and rapid thanks to cell phones and texting. However, is it advantageous for parents to be in close or regular contact via any kind of communication?

However, you don’t have to be alone. This article gives you some tips on how to talk to your grown daughter.

How to Talk to Your Grown Daughter?

When it comes to how to talk to your grown daughter, as hard as it may sound, there are many ways to go about it.

One of them is sharing your ups and downs as a child growing up.

She probably feels like you have set the bar too high, and she doesn’t have what it takes to be like you.

By sharing your story, she will realize that life is about taking a step at a time.

It will encourage them to keep pushing because there is light at the end of the tunnel.

Old communication methods may not work hence the need for modern technologies, including email and texts.

Sometimes, all they need is support rather than criticism.

If they have a suggestion or decision, respect it as it doesn’t sound right to you.

Sometimes they are not looking for approval but rather communicating and sharing.

Instead of reprimanding them, listen and try to understand the problem from their viewpoint. It may surprise you to see how much it makes sense.

You also need to apply some tips. For example, how to talk to your grown child could change the better because of the following.

1. Adjusting Your Parenting

You must admit that things have changed, and your daughter is now a grown-up.

Therefore, it is only fair that your parenting style also follows suit. It would be best if you were permissive and, above all, authoritative.

It is not wise to make it all about rules and control.

On the contrary, let it be more about advice and guidance. Equally important, how you share the advice and guidance could make all the difference.

Couple it with support, affection, and warmth.

Avoid as much as possible offering unsolicited advice because too much of it could make the task even harder.

Learn more in a related post: Why Are Daughters Mean to Their Mothers

2. Always Set Healthy Boundaries

As much as you are the parent, it would help if you listened to your daughter as well.

When airing her grievances or expressing her anger, you have no reason to term it as disrespectful.

On the other hand, if that’s not it and your daughter is causing you distress, humiliation, fear, mental pain, and aguish, demand the respect that you deserve.

Once you fail to tolerate disrespect and at the same time respect her view of things, you will be able to talk to each other rather than at each other.

3. Accept When You Are in The Wrong

You cannot talk to someone who doesn’t want to listen. At times, they won’t listen to you because you hurt them.

Always remember that accepting that you are at fault and apologizing doesn’t make you a lesser parent. 

Otherwise, you can forget about talking because it doesn’t make sense to talk to someone who hurt you.

Justifying hurting her will make the situation even harder. Once you get past that, it will be easy to talk, no doubt. 


If you have been wondering how to talk to your grown daughter, you may have realized that it isn’t that complicated.

It is important to note that it is not what you say but instead how you say it. Always strive to be the bigger person.

Frequently Asked Questions

How Can I Improve My Relationship with My Daughter?

If you want your relationship with your daughter to improve, never compare your children.

Your daughter is probably working harder than the other, but things don’t seem to work well on her end. 

Embrace her despite the shortcomings, and your relationship will improve. But, of course, it is always healthy to have constructive discussions once in a while too.

How Do You Deal with A Difficult Daughter?

The best way to solve the conflict would be to identify the reason behind her behavior. Make her understand that she is in the wrong.

If it is your fault, do not hesitate to apologize. Stop criticizing her and start encouraging her. 

Moms should strive to encourage their daughters to grow up and become strong women.

Why Do Mothers and Daughters Clash?

One of the reasons mothers and daughters often clash is due to the changes that have occurred over the last years.

On one side, a mother who didn’t go to school because that’s what the culture was like then. 

On the other hand, there is another generation of empowered women. Consequently, what one believes in is not what the other does hence the clash.

Related Post: My 12-Year-Old Daughter Smokes




Iesha Mulla

Iesha is a loving mother of 2 beautiful children. She's an active parent who enjoys indoor and outdoor adventures with her family. Her mission is to share practical and realistic parenting advice to help the parenting community becoming stronger.

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