Do you keep asking yourself, why is my grown daughter so mean to me? Welcome to adult parenthood!
It is a tough place to be. You have probably nurtured this solid and loving bond with your daughter since she was a baby all through her teenage years.
Now, she is all grown up, can make her own decisions, but she is still your baby.
The meanness is now eating you alive, and you do not know what is happening.
We understand how hurting the situation is. Studies show that mothers tend to have a very strong bond with their daughters, much more powerful than many of us perceive.
We are here to answer all the questions and ensure you and your daughter and back to that friendly banter in no time.
See related post: My Daughter Is Out Of Control Where Can I Send Her?
Why Is My Grown Daughter So Mean To Me?
There are many reasons why kids are mean to their parents.
But sometimes, they are probably teasing or being sarcastic in their responses.
We end up overthinking the situation and labeling it as ‘mean’.
But are they really mean? Here’s how you know if your daughter is mean and rude towards you:
1. Arguing Over Trivial Topics
We agree you can have a difference of opinion. This is human nature, and people tend to disagree often.
However, the problem arises when she carries on an argument, even when it makes no sense.
She does everything to counter your points all the time without any care.
If her tone is also disrespectful during these scenarios, then yeah, she is absolutely mean.
2. Hates Your Presence
Do you realize a change in how she behaves, looks at you, or talks to you the minute you end up in the same location?
Is the reaction way different from when you leave the room or when she is around someone else?
Perhaps she has stopped inviting you to her home, even for parties, while she invites everyone else?
That’s definitely being mean!
3. Denies Your Requests
Again, think of scenarios where her denial of some of your requests makes no sense at all.
You were probably requesting her to pass you something or do some house chore, and she blatantly ignores or turns you down without a valid reason. All these are signs of meanness.
4. Lack of Kind Gestures
Some small gestures that people do, even without our asking, let us know they care about us—maybe covering you up with a blanket when you fall asleep on the couch—making you a snack or a drink when you are having a long day.
Or maybe it is the small language of touch, where someone tries to hold your hand or give you a little massage just to help you release some tension.
These, among others, are all kind gestures. And if your daughter has stopped and is doing the opposite, they are mean to you.
3 Reasons Why Your Grown Daughter Being So Mean To You
1. Your Parenting
Do you think of yourself as an involved parent? One who was always present, attentive, and kind to her daughter?
Our parenting skills play a huge role in how our children turn out to be in adulthood.
Most of the time, when you are a mean parent to your daughter, they tend to disassociate themselves with you when they grow.
2. Invading Her Privacy
You might have been the best parent they could ever have, but that as they grow, you need to develop some boundaries.
She is an adult now and is capable of making decisions on her own.
Things like knocking before entering her room or not going through her stuff when she is not home because you are afraid she is hiding something.
All this is invading her privacy, and it will lead to mean behavior.
3. Making Her Decisions
Still on the privacy issue. You are probably not respecting her decisions, and you try to overrule those with yours.
This is one of the greatest recipes for meanness and rudeness.
It shows that you do not value her opinion or trust her as an adult to run her life.
Remember that she is all grown up now and not a little girl anymore.
So, do you have answers to why is my grown daughter so mean to me? One or two of these three reasons could be the reasons why she is mean.
But, there could also be a possibility that you are overthinking her sarcastic answers.
Having a good friendly talk might help you clear out the issue.