If you find yourself frequently thinking “My son is out of control where can I send him?” then you are all too familiar with the pains of being a parent to a child that is confrontational, oppositional and disruptive.
Children can be a big strain on any person. As parents, we are always striving to make sure that their social, physical and emotional needs are taken care of.
Sometimes, however, it can be difficult to see past a particular event or developmental stage.
My child is out of control what can I do?
Thinking “my child is out of control what can I do?” is very common as more and more parents struggle to cope with their children. You constantly scrutinize yourself and parenting skills blaming yourself for your out of control daughter or out of control son.
Moreover, babies and toddlers are some of the hardest to cope with. They are going through their own developmental stages and have to get to grips with the changing world around them which is not always straight forward.
Older children, on the other hand, can have an overload of stresses from every day like that constantly influence and shape their behaviour. This can be difficult to express and will be the route cause of disruptive behaviour.
Do You Have Out of Control Children?
According to the U.S. National Library of Medicine, out of control children and children who lash out display the following behaviors:
- damaging or vandalizing property
- harming or threatening other people or pets
- truancy or poor academic performance
- smoking, drinking alcohol, or drug abuse
- early sexual activity
- frequent tantrums and constant arguments
- consistent anger and rebellion against authority
Many times children lash out feeling misunderstood or there being a miscommunication. It can be as simple as your child not feeling that they are being heard and then acting out to get attention.
It’s never an easy option but as parents, we need to put the safety of our children first. This sometimes can mean controlled isolation in community support or a private institution.
Before you think of last resort options available to you let’s first breakdown why your child is acting the way he is and find out the route cause behind it.
My Son Is Out Of Control Where Can I Send Him?
Find out what developmental age your child is at and compare descriptions to ensure you are not dealing with an issue that is common amongst his age group.
Does your child suffer from any learning or attention issues?
For example, does your child suffer from acute ADHD (attention deficit hyperactivity disorder) or sensory processing issues? If you think that he has trouble learning, paying attention and self-control then this may be an important test to take.
Contact your local authority for a free check-up.
Is this a one-off or is this a recurring theme?
By observing your child’s behaviour over time you may start to form patterns of behaviour traits that you can attribute towards a particular event or events.
Did they start disruptive behaviour after a divorce, a death or a similar type of big stressor?
Sometimes these traumatic events can linger for years never dealt with and can manifest into other areas of their personality.
This is a great way to narrow down any bigger problems. Behaviour assessments are a simple set of tasks and procedures that any child can carry out. Pending the results of the test, you can find out if your child has an on-going problem with the way they see the world and authority or if the behaviour is attributed to something else.
What about disruptive behaviour disorders?
If your child is constantly angry, disruptive, defiant and aggressive for six months straight this could show a serious connection to disruptive behaviour disorders.
Keep in mind that disruptive behaviour disorders are not the same as ADHD. While ADHD can fall into more than one area “Conduct Disorder” (CD) and oppositional defiant disorder (ODD).can are a stand-alone disorder.
Seek professional help to determine what can be done to help your child sooner rather than later.
Emotional help is critical
If your child behaviour is overlapping into school and you can see a clear pattern that is affecting his educational wellbeing you should consult a mental health professional. There are many types of help available for children with behaviour issues.
Ask your local school for access to a trained counsellor’s or you can contact your local paediatrician.
If you are still thinking “My Son Is Out Of Control Where Can I Send Him?” then remember that sending him away may not be in his best interest as it will not go to the route of the problem.
However here are your 3 best options:
My Son Is Out Of Control Where Can I Send Him?
Option 1: Boarding School
Most children will need to continue in education. Therefore it’s important to keep this in your mind when you decide to send your child away.
Boarding schools are a great way for gifted children to shine in a safe environment and can provide more assistance for children that need extra special care and attention.
For a Boarding School In Your Local Area – Click Here
Option 2: Family Member
Many people decide to send their disruptive children to a more strict family member. This can be advantageous for a variety of reasons:
- They are in a different house, different environment and sometimes even a different city.
- A new home means new rules
- They start a fresh slate so may not feel the urge to revolt
- Some family members are more strict or may have other children for your child to learn from. Children learn well from other children so a positive role model that lives with them could help them with rehabilitation
- You still can keep a close eye on them and their progress.
Option 3: Social Care
Social Care is a very difficult decision as you will be significantly limiting your ability to see and interact with your child on a long term basis.
If you feel this is the correct approach then reach out to your local authority to check the necessary requirements in your city. Each city is different so be sure the conditions are correct for you to facilitate the process.